Author Archives: Bob Goddard

About Bob Goddard

Freelance writer & horseback rider. And I mean business. Sort of.

A Baby at the Barn

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While wandering around on my day job, it’s not uncommon for me to come across a knot of women ogling and fussing over some object in the center of their tight circle. I try to avoid these little gatherings because it’s either one of two things: free apple fritters or someone’s brand new baby.

Given my struggle with the jods, I certainly don’t need the fritter. And I’m just not interested in the baby. I’m sorry, I’m just not.  They all look alike to me anyway and I’m afraid they’ll ask me if I want to hold the baby. I don’t want to break anything.

Don’t get me wrong.  I think it’s great that young people are still willing to reproduce and replace our losses.  Yes, I’m aware of the consequences of overpopulation to our species, but we at least need some new members. So hats off to those willing to go through all the trouble.

And when my granddaughter is born, I have no doubt I will be in middle of some Baby Knot, proud and beaming. And probably munching on an apple fritter, while people take turns holding and cooing over the obviously gifted infant.

Of course, as all experienced equestrians know, the newborn in the middle of a Baby Knot does not always have to be a biped.  When I arrived at the barn last Thursday for Lesson #27, I noticed that Karin’s car wasn’t there yet. The moment I walked into the barn, Kathy hailed me:

“Come here! Over here!”

Normally, Kathy is very involved in her morning tasks and our greetings are pleasant, but brief. But this wasn’t a normal day.

“GET OVER HERE!” She was standing in front of Goldie’s stall.

So, I got over there. And this what I saw:

Kathy had no one for her Baby Knot and I was the only one around. I have to confess, it was pretty amazing. The little guy, Oakley they call him, was born the night before, not 12 hours ago.

Karin showed up a few minutes later, tired but ecstatic. Goldie is Leoni’s horse, so I guess that makes Karin a kind of grandmother. You know how they are.

Karin had a late night. She said that Oakley had a hard time figuring where to get his meals at first. Someone should have shown him last week’s Time Magazine cover.

On second thought, that might have just added to his confusion.

The Plot Thickens

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I intended to report further on the big vaulting fest and our experience as Equine Photographers. And I will.

But first this: my daughter Hiliary and her husband Andy found out that their baby is going to be….

The Mother

The Father

A VAULTER!

And she’s a girl.

Not that it matters. Boy. Girl. Love them the same.

But it does make it easier to plan and to imagine.  Jenny imagines she is going to be taking me to all kinds of garage sales looking for good baby girl clothes. Jenny has always had a good imagination. And I’ll be busy planning the baby girl’s equestrian career (H and Andy are still in negotiations regarding the name, the pre-gender default name being “Sherman”).

Anyway, I have the sport picked out:

The Sport

I have the coach:

The Coach

I have the horse:

The Horse.

I know that you noticed that vaulting involves standing upright on a moving horse.  And there are other kinds of mischiefs and trickeries involved.  So isn’t this a little unsafe?  Well, it has more risk than a Sunday stroll down the sidewalk and any activity that has to do with large, strong animals carries an inherent risk. For sure.

But…

A few things came to mind while I was busy snapping pictures at the vaulting clinic. There is only one horse involved. That really cuts down on the unpredictability.  The horse is on a longe line. They use very steady, well-trained horses. And the coach is always just a few feet away.

Horse vaulting is sometimes described as “gymnastics on a horse”.   Sounds scary, eh?  But, what we saw last Saturday was more akin to “ballet on a horse”.  Again, the maneuvers no doubt get more complex and risky as you move up, but it’s all approached with a higher degree of confidence, awareness and skill.

Besides, according to Hiliary, Baby Girl “Sherman” (c’mon H and Andy make a decision!) is already practicing flips in there.  From the sounds of it, she may already have some kind of horse. So we have a head start.

A Photogenic Horse Show

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Jenny and I went to the Tulip Fest Vaulting Fest and Clinic at Centennial Acres Equestrian Center in Holland on Saturday. We took a bazillion pictures.  Well, 742 photos to be exact. And I lost track of how many movie clips we got.  We’re still sorting through all of it.  I expect that my next few posts are going to be about vaulting.

We only stayed for half the day, our cameras were filled and our batteries were running low. Next time we’ll stay for the whole day.  Or maybe just come for the second half.

It was fun.  It was like other horseshows in many respects. There was a judge and there was music. There were excited kids with nervous parents. And there were excited parents with nervous kids. And bored siblings.

And we weren’t the only ones taking pictures. Vaulting has to be the most photogenic of all equestrian disciplines.

Our good friends Caroline and Sherrin joined Jenny and me.  It was fun having them there. Both Caroline and Sherrin are knowledgeable horsepeople who appreciate all things equine. I like listening to them.

More on vaulting next time….

Vaulting Fun

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While Karin’s Horse Connection does a little bit of everything, I think Karin’s Big Specialty is in vaulting.  In fact, a subset of Karin’s Horse Connection is the Vaulting Connection.  This Saturday, the Vaulting Connection will be presenting The 2012 Tulip Vaulting Fest and Clinic in Holland, Michigan (click on the “Karin’s Horse Connection” tab at the top for more information).

Jenny and I are going.  We will be taking photos, taking videos, but we won’t be taking chances.  That is, I’m not going to try to stand up on a moving horse like I did last time.

I think that vaulting is the most visually stunning of all equestrian sports.  I like watching it for the same reason I like listening to J.S. Bach: they just seem like they know what they’re doing. I don’t understand the details of how it’s judged or performed, but that doesn’t matter. I don’t know what “Toccata in D Minor” means either, but that doesn’t stop me from cranking up the volume when I hear it.

Sometimes you just have to let the art flow over you in order to appreciate it.  Leave the analysis to the experts.  They’ll figure it all out.

Of course the big fun is watching how the kids respond to this equestrian sport.  I have documentary proof that they like it very much indeed:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Vaulting is an art form that inspires other creative works:

And I had fun putting together a slideshow:

On Monday, I will report on the 2012 Tulip Vaulting Fest and Clinic.

Slideshow music: Down Home Rockin’ Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons “Attribution 3.0″ http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/“
ISRC: US-UAN-11-00252

Senior Student

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Another good thing about being an equestrian is that it gives you the opportunity to meet interesting people. On Lesson #24, I shared the outdoor arena with Dr. Hamid Ehsan, a brand new student.

Dr. Ehsan on Charley

In a few months, Dr. Ehsan will be starting his residency at Johns Hopkins. Until then he will be taking riding lessons from Karin three times a week. Dr. Ehsan comes from a long line of equestrians, but has little riding experience himself.

Oh, and his wife will soon be completing her residency at Butterworth Hospital.

Oh, and they are expecting their first child in June.

And I thought I was busy.

Something occurred to me as we were warming up in the arena: a year ago I was concerned about things like survival and gravity. Today, I’m not only alive and mostly well, I have seniority.

Being an upper level rider is not all fun and games.  Providing a good example to new riders is an awesome responsibility. As Karin was working with Dr. Ehsan and Charley on the longe line, she points over to our end of the arena and says: “See how Bob is posting on Vinnie?  He’s working on his rhythm right now.”

By “right now” she means “for the rest of his life”.

Vinnie and I circle around to their end and pass them on the rail:  gut sucked in, chest puffed out, head held high.

Heels down, baby.

Up-down-up-down-up-down-up-down. This is how it’s done.

Then one heel come out of the stirrup.

Up-up-down-up-down-down-down-up-wup-wup.  Oh, crap.

Not to worry.  They were having their own issues and didn’t see the little mess I created at “E”. Nothing to do but regain our composure and give it another go.

I employed a number of advanced riding maneuvers such as Walking to the Road Apple Near “H” Then Turn Left, Trot When I Say and Not When You Want, Circle in the Shape of a Fried Egg and, of course, I couldn’t resist showing off my Staying Out of the Corner Technique.

Karin asked me if I wanted to go out into the field.

“You mean, by myself, Karin?”

I have never rode outside the arena unsupervised.

“No, not by yourself. Take Hamid with you and show him our trail. I’ll join you in a few minutes on Rambo.”

Awesome.

It was another one of those oh-so-beautiful mornings, the horses were happy and I spent the next 15 minutes acting as Trail Master.

Dr. Ehsan and I had a nice conversation and he told me about an equestrian sport they do in Pakistan.  I’m going to learn how to spell it and I’ll tell you about it next time.

Nucleus of a Posse

The Belly Wars

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Over the last ten months, I’ve discovered that an equestrian career involves much more than just showing up for lessons.  Once you get on the main path, you begin to discover that the path is actually a complex network of trails involving your mind, body, checkbook and – if you will – soul.

Well, at least your “core”.

I’ve heard a lot about this “core”.  How important it is. How a rider should use it. Why it should be strong.

I’m just not exactly sure what it is. I figure it’s gotta be something in the middle, right?  Probably centering on your belly region and extending to the neighboring body parts.

I’m worried that I don’t have a core. That my core has been devoured by a Greedy Gut, having its own way and dominating the region like an overconfident hegemon. Years of bad habits and a reduced metabolic rate have created this Body Part Bully who blocks my progress down the Golden Path of Equestrian Glory. It mocks me. It dares me. When I stand up, it looks like it my toes grow out of it. There will be no photos in today’s post.

Well, if Greedy Gut wants a fight, its got one: Jenny signed us up for a class on Core Strengthening.

Actually, the Belly Wars have been going on for some time now.  I dropped 20 pounds in the months prior to the start of my equestrian career last year.   Then, in a powerful winter offensive, Greedy Gut regained half of its lost territory. And the jods sit folded in the front closet.

This is our counter-offensive. The class begins in June. That gives me two months to lose the 10 pounds I gained during the hibernation months. Then let the strengthening begin.

This is war.

One-Horse Equestrian

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Karin gave me an open-ended choice on what horse to ride for Lesson #23.  After an exhaustive process of weighing the pros and cons of each of Karin’s horses, followed by thorough analysis of the possible implications and outcomes of my choice, I picked Vinnie.

Nah. I actually put in approximately .00003 seconds of mental effort in choosing the Thoroughbred.  No second thoughts on this one. Hell, I barely gave it a First Thought.

He’s just a good, good horse. At 16 hands, Vinnie is a good size for me and he is pretty much push-button when it comes to cues.  Not that I know where his buttons are. But he knows where they are and I think he uses some of form of equine telepathy to get the job done.  It’s just way easy riding him.

Of course, when I say “easy”, I mean Walking Around Easy. Once I go into the trot on any horse, the whole thing becomes a big mess real quick, so it’s probably best that I take every advantage I can and ride the easiest horse possible.

We had a nice warm up period in the outdoor arena.  Karin went to get Charley and this gave Vinnie and I chance to get reacquainted.  It’s been a while since I rode him.

When Karin and Charley showed up, she asked me if we had trotted yet. I didn’t realize I could do this without permission.  I thought “Trot” was a restricted gait for me.  (Canter being the “Forbidden Gait” and Gallop is “The Unimaginable”).

So, we trotted.

And we trotted.

And we trotted.

Finally, Vinnie just plain broke into a canter.  I guess he couldn’t stand it anymore.  And he did this all by himself. I mean, I was still mounted, but he did it without me asking him to.

In any case, this is the first time I’ve ever cantered on a horse without being on a longe line. Who cares if it wasn’t scheduled?

I thought this might be a good time to suggest to Karin that I stick with riding one horse and use the same saddle every week. This is something my Council of Advisors has suggested on more than once occasion.

Karin nodded and said it would be good idea.  She agreed that I could make some good progress with a little more consistency.  And she wanted to know which horse I wanted to use.

She really didn’t need to ask.

Jumping to Conclusions

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On Lesson #22, we had some company in the arena. While Krystal and I were getting stuck in corners, I spotted one of Karin’s other students, Joselyn, setting up a jump. I didn’t even know Karin had those.

I tried to remember if there was anything I said or did that would make Karin think I wanted to do this. Or was ready for it. Maybe there was a jumping related lesson I had forgotten about? I don’t always pay attention as much as I should.

Let's just go back to our corner

I think Krystal noticed too, because she was shaking her head in the “I Don’t Think So Tim” manner.  Or maybe that was me doing the shaking and it just appeared like the horse’s head was going back and forth.

In any case, the jump was for Joselyn and Rambo, Karin’s blind-in-one-eye pony. Rambo is pretty short and has that mad little gait with the quick, enthusiastic steps typical of small, but energetic quadrupeds. And he loves to jump.

Jumping is one of those things I never get tired of watching. I think it’s because jumpers really look like they know what they’re doing. And everybody seems to have such a good time. Except for the Moms & Dads who forgot the Ativan. Every good jumping program should have someone in charge of sedating the parents.  “Sedation Manager” – that’s the kind of job I could do.

Wingless Flight

Leoni showed up about half way through the lesson/jumping performance. As we watched Joselyn and Rambo bound around the arena, I asked Leoni if she wanted to see me jump.

“Yeah! But we should raise the pole first.” This is how vaulters think.

How Leoni Thinks

“No, Leoni. You have to help me out of the corner and off the horse. Then I can jump.”

Karin said that if I thought ahead and started turning earlier I wouldn’t have the corner problem in the first place.

To save face, I challenged Joselyn to a race. It was a bluff, of course.

Joselyn shook her head, “Krystal would win.”

“Perhaps, Joselyn. But I wouldn’t be on her when she crossed the finish line.”

So here is how I figure the placings would go:

1st Krystal

2nd The Front Half of Rambo

3rd Joselyn

4th The Rear Half of Rambo

5th Bob – with one foot dragging and one hand on my head.

At least Karin got some good photos of Joselyn and Rambo catching air.

 

 

 

 

Rhymes with Trot

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For Lesson #22 Karin had me ride Krystal, her Percheron Thoroughbred mare. Krystal was an insolent adolescent type before she came to Karin. She was pushy, disrespectful and couldn’t along with members of her own species. Karin provided Krystal with a stable routine and the right kind of attention and turned her into “A well trained dressage horse with nice gaits.”  At least that’s what the brochure says.

Krystal and Karin discuss the up coming lesson with Bob

Krystal is good horse, no doubt. I’ve talked to a couple of other riders at the barn who say she is their favorite. Rider reviews carry a lot of weight with me.

For me, Krystal is like one of your kids or an employee or a student – or anyone you’re supposed to be supervising – who knows the game better than you do. They know how to follow instructions in the most literal sense, but won’t give you an inch more. They know exactly what they can get away with not doing.

Before mounting, I walked Krystal around the arena in an attempt to establish the proper relationship. No problem.

Then I got on and made a few trips around the arena at the walk. No problem.

Karin asked me if I would like to trot. Now, if I was one those passive resistive types noted above, I would have taken this question in its most literal sense and would’ve engaged my instructor in a five-minute philosophical discussion concerning how I view The Trot as opposed to other gaits.

But I pay for these lessons and thus I take a more business-like approach to this kind of direction.  I responded by cueing Krystal to trot:

“Krystal…. trot.”

And she did.

For just a moment. I forgot to mention how long I wanted her to trot.

Karin told me to try to keep my legs on the horse to keep her going.

“Krystal… trot.”

And she did.

For just a moment. I guess my legs weren’t clear enough.

Then Karin said something – some sort of instruction, I think. But I didn’t hear what she was trying to say.

So, I said, “What?”

And Krystal began to trot.

Oh. I see.  Of course. “What” rhymes with “trot.”

Okay fine. Let’s try this again.

“Krystal…”

And before I could say “trot”, Krystal started trotting.

It got to where all I had to do was to say something out loud – anything – and Krystal started trotting. But always for just a few seconds.  Her favorite ploy was to head directly to the corner of the arena and just stop. I mean, it wasn’t her job to figure out a solution to the Corner Puzzle.

In retrospect, I should have just kept talking to keep the horse moving.  But, really, I was laughing too much. Ever since the What/Trot thing, I had lost my business approach to the lesson.

It was a completely unproductive lesson in terms of proper riding form. But it was still a lot of fun. And next time, Krystal and I are going to have a very different sort of lesson together.

“Figuring someone out” can go both ways.

Krystal gets to finish her breakfast. It's only fair.

A Good Barn Home

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Since the start of my equestrian career last summer, I’ve been remembering a lot of stuff from when the girls had horses. I recall being in a variety “barn home” situations. When I say variety, I mean that some of them sucked. For one reason or another.

Usually the problems revolved around some kind of Boarding Barn Drama or Equestrian Organization Discord, which seems to be common in the horse world. Horsepeople tend to have strong personalities – some are overtly psychotic – and when you cram too many of them in one place, it can get a little dicey. I know you all have your own stories.

We found good situations as well. And when we did, it was very rewarding. Horsepeople can be the most awesome of all people and if you find the right fit, you can make friends for life. My girls still have contact with more than a few people they met in their early teens.

The more I experience I have at Karin’s Horse Connection, the more I believe that it belongs to the second kind of barn home situation. The whole atmosphere is friendly, positive and family orientated.

It’s a fun place with a lot going on all of the time. They host fun shows and clinics.  Karin offers a therapeutic riding program and a program for senior riders. She also leads the “Blaze With Grace” 4-H club and coaches Grandville’s Equestrian Team.

Karin’s Horse Connection holds “Total Horse Lover’s Camp” for the kids during spring break and in the summer time. During these camps, each kid gets to “own” his or her own pony or horse for an entire week. And KHC is one of only a handful of places in West Michigan that participates in vaulting.

This was exactly the kind of “barn situation” I was looking for a year ago. On our first visit last year, Jenny and I got to watch Karin and her daughter, Leoni, give a vaulting lesson. We came away with a pretty good feeling about the place and that hasn’t changed.

It’s nice to have a good barn home.